Day 12
First thing in the morning. Fog was everywhere and it wasn't as humid as normal.
Today marks a very monumental day…my stepsons are going back to school. They’ve fought it tooth and nail (well E
has, anyway). For E, this is his first day in middle school. I know he’s nervous, but he’ll rock it. I know it. So will D.
The hardest part about being here is that I miss those milestones. Taking them to school on the first day, seeing them when they come home and asking how their day was. Right now things are tough. I won’t get into it much except to say the way I do things and the way their Mom does is like night and day.
It’s hard for them to talk with me online. And it’s hard for me to see them confused and hurt. It was like I just got there and then had to leave again. I get it. But I’m still right here.
Jerry is blessed with a large family. I have four wonderful step-children and three adorable grandchildren whom I love more than life itself. Add in little Bran and my heart is just full to capacity. I would do anything for these guys.
My stepdaughters are strong and independent in their own ways. I miss them, too. C starts college soon and that’s a wonderful thing. DJ is raising the most adorable little boy and working hard at finding her place in this world.
While I’m here I find that I have time on my hands. Time I’d rather spend picking up kids and hugging them. Time I’d rather spend watching them go to school for the first day in their new clothes and nervous smiles. Time I’d love to come and babysit when the girls get frustrated with their children. I’m not whining. I love my country and I love the job she calls me to do. I wouldn’t go back and change a thing in my career or my choices. But I miss you guys.
I’m proud of you. All of you. And I love you with all my heart.