From Turkey With Love

Day 22

The hardest post I’ve ever had to write. Days grow long and I find I’ve got more time on my hands than I’d expected. Most days that’s okay. It keeps me relaxed and motivated to get something else done. Today’s not one of those days. My mind’s preoccupied with a very special day. My son’s 3rd birthday. You’ll have to forgive me, but these pics are from before I left for Turkey. We celebrated lil B’s birthday early so I could be there.

Tonight a few of us went out and watched Star Trek (which by the way, you should see just for the movie, whether you’re a Star Trek fan or not). Tomorrow I’ll be heading to a beach and relaxing, getting out of the dorm room so I can take more pictures for the family.

I won’t spend the words telling you how hard it is to miss such an important day, or tell you how I fight off the tears every time I see one of his pictures. Sometimes I wonder where the tough chick I used to be went. No one told me growing up meant I’d get mushy and sentimental

So baby, from me to you, Happy Birthday Lil Dude. You’re always in your Momma’s heart and constantly on her mind. I miss you baby.

Just chillin' on a cold afternoon

Some days we would just hang out and play. We’ll do it again soon! Before you know it, baby.

Haven't quite got the "blow them out" instead of "ooo touch the light" thing down yet.

LOL. He kept trying to touch the flame instead of blowing it out. Little firebug just like his daddy

I’m sending lots of love to my kiddo and the family. Lots of hugs and kisses.

Peace, I’m out.

Day 12

First thing in the morning. Fog was everywhere and it wasn't as humid as normal.

Today marks a very monumental day…my stepsons are going back to school. They’ve fought it tooth and nail (well E
has, anyway). For E, this is his first day in middle school. I know he’s nervous, but he’ll rock it. I know it. So will D.

The hardest part about being here is that I miss those milestones. Taking them to school on the first day, seeing them when they come home and asking how their day was. Right now things are tough. I won’t get into it much except to say the way I do things and the way their Mom does is like night and day.

It’s hard for them to talk with me online. And it’s hard for me to see them confused and hurt. It was like I just got there and then had to leave again. I get it. But I’m still right here.

Jerry is blessed with a large family. I have four wonderful step-children and three adorable grandchildren whom I love more than life itself. Add in little Bran and my heart is just full to capacity. I would do anything for these guys.

My stepdaughters are strong and independent in their own ways. I miss them, too. C starts college soon and that’s a wonderful thing. DJ is raising the most adorable little boy and working hard at finding her place in this world.

While I’m here I find that I have time on my hands. Time I’d rather spend picking up kids and hugging them. Time I’d rather spend watching them go to school for the first day in their new clothes and nervous smiles. Time I’d love to come and babysit when the girls get frustrated with their children. I’m not whining. I love my country and I love the job she calls me to do. I wouldn’t go back and change a thing in my career or my choices. But I miss you guys.

I’m proud of you. All of you. And I love you with all my heart.

Day 2

The last day with the boys before I left. It was a beautiful day.

It’s Day 2 in the world of Turkey and I’m limited in what I can take pictures of…for a few days, anyway. I’m missing my boys. While two of them are step-kids, that doesn’t diminish the ache in my heart at missing them. More than anything in the world. I hope they know I love them with all my heart.